Celebrating My Son

DSC_0019My son has just recently reached the nine month mark of his life.  He’s been on the outside longer than he was on the inside now.  It’s weird to think of it that way, but my mind thinks weirdly.  The reason his age is on my mind right now is because my wife, his mother, is already planning out his first birthday party, or in my son’s case, birthday parties.  Yes, my wife feels we need to have two parties so both our friends here in Chicago along with our families back in Michigan can partake in our son’s celebration of making it a year with us as parents.

If the hint of sarcasm in the end of the last paragraph didn’t come off quite strong enough then I’ll just go ahead and say it.  I’m not a fan of large parties celebrating anything.  I’ve never done much celebrating for any of my birthdays throughout my life and usually don’t like making a big deal about birthdays.  I’m not sure why, but to me a birthday is simply another day on the calendar.  (This is really making me come off as a curmudgeon and maybe I am, but please hear me out before passing judgement.  People can change you know.)

DSC_0035My wonderful and beautiful wife has been searching Pinterest for party ideas and planning now for a couple of months.  Every time she shows me a picture or shares an idea I just say, “that’s nice” or “looks like fun”.  I know I’m not being helpful or giving great input, but to me it seems like a bunch of work for something my son won’t even remember.  I know that sounds horrible and these early memories are for us the parents to have and to capture so we can share later on in his life, but why can’t we have a small shindig for the family instead of multiple parties with people we may not be friends with in six months.  (I guess you could say I’m the bellyacher of celebrating oneself).

DSC_0065All of this being said, I know these birthday celebrations are not about me or my wife or the people who will be coming to the party.  It’s about our son and how we want him to enjoy life in the best way possible.  That belief outweighs all of my negative thoughts about birthdays and the hassle that comes with parties.  Me being able to put aside my bah humbug attitude will help my son see that it isn’t always about what you want but what is best for all people involved.  This is a realization that I’m beginning to get a better understanding of myself with my son’s help.  He’s taught me so much in his first nine months and I know I’ll be writing about that in a future post once I have a better understanding of it all.

I plan on enjoying his big day with a smile on my face and joy in my voice.  I want to celebrate my son for who he is and who he will become and I know if I don’t influence him positively in the years of his early development I am only asking for trouble when he’s a teenager.  I also plan on helping my wife however I can when the time comes for us to set the party plans in motion.  I am the one who thought having the family party at a park instead of her parent’s house would be better for all involved.

I’m sure as the time comes near to when my son turns one you’ll hear more of my complaints and struggles with his birthday plans, but just keep in mind that many of my complaints are nothing but empty words and the only reason I’m sharing them with you is so I’m not too negative around my wife as she puts everything together.

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About jharbottle7

I'm a husband, a father, want-to-be writer, struggling blogger and cyclist. Starting a family has changed my life and made me want to become a better person.
This entry was posted in baby, family, fatherhood, son and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Celebrating My Son

  1. Pat says:

    It’s not about what he will remember but what he grows up knowing in his heart–he’s loved. And you’ll always know you gave him the best–your love. Besides, you’ll end up having fun too!

  2. echo says:

    I agree with Pat. My mom gets frustrated with me sometimes because I don’t remember some fun things from my childhood. But, I can remember growing up feeling loved. One of my favorite quotes goes something like: you can’t always remember what a person has said, but you always remember how they make you feel.

    As an aside, I hate parties and avoid them like the plague. My parents gave me an option once i grew up a little: a party or the cash we would’ve spent on the party? I always chose the cash.

    • jharbottle7 says:

      This is what I’m trying to make myself realize. It’s not what we do but how we do it that matters.
      And if I would have been given that option I would have gone with the cash as well.

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